“On one hand, I am pleased that Jana Astanov, an enlightened artist, sees merit in my poem about racism. On the other, it saddens me that this composition is still relevant today.” ~Bob McNeil
Racism & Senseless Slaughter, isn’t just a “Black & White”, thing. It’s about, speaks, and reflects HUMANITY on a whole.
Produced By: Crocus Bag Muzik Wurxz
“WE HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!”
Something Has To Change
“I LOVE YOU MOMMY
You carried me in your womb,
protected against all elements.
You brought me forth – Even though you were lost.
You taught me to walk, to talk, to read & to heed…
I learned how to depend on Self, for all of my needs.
Urging me to ALWAYS ask questions,
Oh Mommy, I still do! Over & over again.
You came from Jamaica – Land of Wood & Water,
Precious, oh Precious – Natures daughter.
When you fell, I fell too but I overstood your pain.
For I too trodded with our generational strain.
“Once a man, but twice a child”,
Even in hospice, lol, I made you smile.
I wrote this poem especially for you,
Do you remember when I was 5 & wrote my 1st Haiku?
I used to long for the years of miscommunications & lost.
But a bouquet of roses you got daily, no matter the cost.
Yes, I’m grown and some may laugh & think it’s funny,
But I will call you My BabyGirl, My Mommy…
I Love You Always, may your Soul remain Sunny.
~Maxwanette A Poetess
I literally wrote this poem 5 minutes ago. I was simply missing my Mommy. She was 62 years young when she transcended due to Cancer.
My Mom was the 1st Poet in my life and my hero. She suffered from mental illness & put me out of her home by the time I was 11 years old (Brooklyn, NY was something back then). We had a turbulent relationship until one day I realized that my Mom was suffering from mental illness. I couldn’t remain angry at her, no matter the damage that was done. How can one remain bitter & angry when a person’s going through mental hell…For the majority of their lives? I couldn’t. So I took care of her until she closed her eyes. She was my best friend & my Baby.
Mental Illness is real and it can & does destroy lives. *More people suffer from it than we know, realize or care to acknowledge. Heck, who hasn’t lost it here & there, especially when life can batter you from pillar to post? It’s important to remember our HUMANITY, LOVE, OVERSTANDING & COMPASSION. Because those that are suffering? Are our Mothers, Fathers, Siblings, Aunts, Uncles, Cousins, Grandparents, Children, Friends, Wives, Husbands, Pets and yes, even ourselves.
“We’re All In This Thing Called Life, TOGETHER…Remember?”
“Namastè & One Love”❤💛💚
P.S. Yeah writing this had me crying. Then I quickly stopped. Why? Because I could see my Mommy giving me that look & hear her telling me to stop it, stand-up, be strong, you got this Max, keep it pushing and I? “I AM MY MOTHER’S CHILD.”
As heartbreaking as this is, I must share it. https://www.facebook.com/583966142124589/posts/612754602579076/
How I’ve Grown
How I’ve grown.
Momma threw me out when I was 11-the voices in her head told her to.
Daddy was done with me by age 15. If I slept with him? I could’ve stayed.
Now I’m all on my own.
My oh my! How I’ve Grown.
As September’s end blows cold.
A shelter is the focus, food & education is the least of interests.
He drove up, trying to talk.
I kept moving, hurrying up my walk.
Then that breeze blew & right then I knew…I had to stop. I looked at him & forced a smile.
My oh my! How I’ve Grown.
I was 15, he was 34,
Out of the Winter in the streets.
I peed his bed the first time we’d sleep.
Stunted growth, separating of weeds.
Mistakes made, lessons learned, wounds no longer bleed.
My oh my! How I’ve Grown.
Beaten down, left for dead.
Ignoring the things that others said,
I lived on…
Decision after decision,
Choice after choice,
I learned how to find my own voice.
My oh my! How I’ve Grown.
©Maxwanette A Poetess
Should we write about grief?…You’re darn right we should!
Grief is a serious & in-depth emotion. Situations & experiences that produce this, need to be confronted and dealt with.
We all have our own ways in which to grieve and how we deal with it. But the fact still remains, it needs & should be addressed.
I recall when my Mother transcended in 2008 from Cancer. I went through the motions, held everyone up, took care of the funeral services, etc. I laughed, cheered everyone up & was doing awesomely well. A year later, while holding her urn I broke down. I cried. No, I bawled & howled like the wounded person I was. I held that grief for an entire year. It wasn’t good nor was it healthy. I had refused to grieve out of plain old fear. Fear that I had to accept realistically, she was gone physically & that I’d die from the pain of that reality.
It’s not a good idea nor healthy to not deal with grief. Being a Poet, it’s a great outlet to express it. But I couldn’t at the time. My heart literally froze & made my chest hurt. After my meltdown, I had to find other ways to deal with my grief. I’m a firm believer that grief should be dealt with & discussed. People die, people feel pain from loss, tragedy and or life experiences. I honestly feel it’s inhumane not to deal with grief.
Here’s an article in my favorite magazine “Poets & Writers” – you should subscribe, the resources they have are AWESOME 😎
~Maxwanette A Poetess
by, Maxwanette A Poetess
Having been born in Brooklyn, NY – “Yo, Brooklyn! What’s uuuup!!!” followed by a (((SLIGHT RIGHT-SIDE HEAD NOD)))😎 If you didn’t get that? Lol, please ignore it. It ain’t fo’ yahhh! 😂It’s simply a Brooklyn thang. Old School practice; No matter where we are, we remember where we’re from, BROOKLYN for Life Baby!…That used to mean something, back in the days. You were PROUD to say & to rep that you were born & raised in the BK.
It was a code of the streets, our people, unity, strength, happiness & love seeing one another still making it through the struggle. Shewwwt, people used to lie & say they were from Brooklyn. But those who knew, knew. Nowadays, people try to deny that they’re even from there. “Our Brooklyn” is gone.
How things have changed. Some good or bad, depending on who’s looking. I used to love Brooklyn & swore I’d never leave. Funny how as I got older, it felt like Hell. I miss “Old Brooklyn”, but life goes on & that’s what change brings. But I’ll always love & remember the Brooklyn that I grew up with. But life in NY’s just too much. Heck, I finally left and this time? For good.
But theres also my heritage, ancestry, my parent’s birthplace & living there for 20 something years of their lives. Both coming to America in their own way, meeting in Brooklyn, NY and the rest goes on, one way or another.
Jamaica, Jamaica, Jamaica – She’s suffering the same fate that we go through in America. What this beautiful country used to be has changed. It’s going through a storm. A purging, be it good or bad, right or wrong. Something is wrong in Jamaica.
But is she any different than anywhere else? Not anymore. Once upon a time, one could & would swear that nothing like what happens in America would happen there. Well Jamaica has become Jamerica. They smuggle cocaine, they rape, murder, abuse you name it. Crime exists there just like anywhere else. Heinous acts against life exist there. It always has, just like anywhere else. But at the moment it’s on the rise & in the spotlight.
Many people fear going Home. People are fearing for their lives as Jamaica is going through its turmoil. Now I’m hearing that Jamaica is now dangerous to visit?? Yo! Is whatta really gwan dung deh doe e? Really? Is this now the New Jamerica? What di Rasta dem wen a warn wi bout back inna di early days & people seh dem mad? Yah Mon, yuh zeeit doe e?…If Jamaica doesn’t do something to turn this around? She will continue to eat herself until the island is clear & start all over again. Wether it’s of her own doing or by others. “Jamaica Wake-Up!” If it didn’t work in America it won’t work there. You will get what we get here. Even the innocent will be caught up.
Jamaicans used to “LIVE” to return home on vacation. Buying a piece of land & building your house back home, is something that was instilled in Jamaicans from birth. Taught to see the beauty & value in the land. Now they’re dying out there instead. Not good nor productive. But Jamaica has been changing for some time now. Lost in the not having & the wanting, forgetting that we have ourselves and one another. The power of Love & Unity, “Out of Many, One People”…Heyyyy remember?
My own family cheated my Mother out of her land & house that she paid for; sick or not. Took the piece they swapped it for from her too & left my siblings & I with nothing, lol! They took another piece from a cousin of mine that is rightfully hers by her dead father. I fight for none. Not because I’m American born, but because if land & money causes you to turn on yourself and your own? Lol, Darlin’? You can keep it. I will not fight for the negativity you sold your Soul for. Karma & the Most High will seal & deal with that situation. I curse you not, for you have already cursed yourselves. Greed & lack of love is what is killing Jamaica. Bottom-line.
But guess what? This is not just happening in Jamaica. This shit is GLOBAL. We just don’t pay attention. This isn’t an American, Jamaican, European thing. Lol! Nope, never really was. This shit is a HUMAN THING.
I LOVE JAMAICA. I may not have been born there, but it’s in my blood, my family, the people, the country…”THERE IS NO OTHER LIKE IT!” The Jamaica I grew up with, the positivity of it? Was & is something that shines so bright it’s a huge part of what makes Jamaicans stand out in the crowd…In Life.
No disrespect, but let di Yankee school unnuh😉…“Give us vision lest we perish”…Remember? Open your eyes Jamaica. Look around you. If you continue to close your eyes to what is going on & just follow? Then you will be lead. “TAN UP JAMAICA!” Remain strong inna yuhself! We nuh mix & wi nuh blen-blen! We nuh fallah. AH WE SET DI TREND! Created differently for a PURPOSE. Check unnuh foot or like others, you will be trampled. Tek back unnuh country, Love of life and one another. Where will Jamaicans return to if it continues this way. Where & what will “Yard” & “Home” be? It will be gone.
Do I have a right to speak on Jamaican life? Yuh dayum right I do. I maybe born here ah Foreign. But my blood is as Jamaican as those born there. I feel Jamaica in my Soul, & in my root. I wish America would change too. Love & Unity around the WORLD (((SIGHHHH))), Yeah, that would be nice. It would be paradise. But highly unlikely anytime soon. I’m a realist 😎
Jamaica still has more hope. Those of you who know why & how know exactly what I mean. There’s something very SPECIAL about Jamaica.
Mi dun talk. Luv unnuh!💋💋💋
Jamaica’s National Pledge
Jamaica’s National Anthem
“We’re All In This Thing Called Life Together…Remember?”❤️💛💚
We are to love one another, for we are our Brothers & Sisters Keepers. It isn’t a political thing, a racial thing, or anything except one thing…”LOVE.” Love of Self, Others, & Life. We’ve got to do better than this…
✍🏾Essay by, SANDRA PARKS✍🏾
I do not celebrate it & holidays on a whole except for Kwanzaa.
I simply feel it’s wrong & inhumane of me, to celebrate the slaughtering of innocent lives & be “thankful” for it. To each his own for I judge none, but I pass.
“Namastè & One Love”❤️💛💚
We at P.L.O.T.S., send Positive Vibes your way, during this difficult time. Stay Blessed.❤️💛💚
“We’re all in this thing called life, TOGETHER…Remember?”~Maxwanette A Poetess
(Picture derived from Google)
“I LOVED YOU”
I loved you even when you caused me pain
I loved you even though there was nothing to gain
I loved you even when others said I shouldn’t
I loved you even when I thought I couldn’t
I loved you and tried to make things fit
I loved you even when you called me “Bitch”
I loved you even when my heart was scorched
I loved you when with child, you were mackin’ on my porch
I loved you when I couldn’t eat
I loved you when I couldn’t sleep
I loved you when I went down the street to get your child scraped out of me
I loved you over valley and hills
I loved you even while you ran up my bills
I loved you when I sent you to jail
I loved you when they let you out without bail
I loved you the times I put you out in the cold
I loved you when you came back and you I could hold
I loved you when you mistreated me
I loved you when you screwed me until I screamed
I loved you even though you loved Cherie & ShellyAnn
I loved you more than any man
I loved you even though you gave me nothing for Valentine’s Day
I loved you even though I was your wife, but your girlfriend got paid
I loved you, even though I knew you were running game
I loved you even though you didn’t feel the same
I loved you and cried inside as you told me lies
I loved you even though I saw the deceit in your eyes
I loved you even though I knew, the only one you loved was you
I loved you so much it took a while for me to see…
That I wasn’t loving me.
*Sometimes in life’s relationships, we’re so busy with “being” in love, that even toxicity is overlooked. This isn’t loving or what it’s meant to be. It is during this endurance we fail to see that by allowing these types of relationships to be, we aren’t being loved nor are we loving ourselves.
© Maxwanette A Poetess, All Rights Reserved.